1.) I don't know if I'll love this baby/I didn't fall in love with this baby at first sight.
The first half of this applies before the baby is born, and I'm pretty sure is a common fear. You change as soon as the baby is born, and knowing that can psych you out a little. The second half happens all the time. I know for me it was not love at first sight. They laid her on my belly and all I could think was "That's a cute baby. I just gave birth to that. I'm starving. GET ME SOME FREAKING FOOD." But as soon as I held her, I was smitten. And now I'm total mush.
2.) My life is over.
Wrongo. I'm sure for some, the drastic change is terrifying, and for some they aren't going to change much. Then there are the ones who start fresh. Life really just begins when you have a child. It's a whole new life, not just a new chapter. For me it was like hitting the long needed reset button. I am proud to say a got a second chance to be the best version of me possible, because my kid deserves it.
3.) I'm a horrible parent. I don't know what I'm doing, and I'm a failure.
For some parenthood is just second nature, and for some not so much. But there are always days that you feel this way. No, you aren't a horrible parent, and no, you don't know what you're doing. You've never been a parent before, but the baby hasn't had parents before either so they don't know the difference. You're not a failure, just put on a brave face, forge ahead, and fake it until you make it. And you will make it.
4.) I can't stand all this crying.
Believe me, the crying gets to you. My daughter, luckily, is usually pretty content and happy. She doesn't cry much, but when she does, a lot of the time it's in excess, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. And I probably am. But the crying does stop, and what little sanity I had to begin with comes back.
5.) What about me? What about my wants and needs? What about my unaccomplished dreams?
What about you? Your last selfish thought. I thought this about this a lot while I was pregnant, and in the first few days afterwards, but I came to realize, I can still do all of the things I wanted to do. It may take a little long for me to finish school, or be harder to work out when I want, but I can and should still go after what I want, and take care of me, as long as it doesn't harm my family in any shape or form.
I can admit that I've thought all of these, but at the end of the day, or crying, which ever comes first, I remember no matter what life throws at me, I have to do what's best for my family, I have a huge, and I mean huge, support network, I have insane inner strength, and that this is my child, I now know what true love is.
;)
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